Those High Tech Machines at the Hospital

As there were no magazines or newspapers available to entertain me, whilst waiting for my wife’s appointment at the local hospital, and not being one for sitting still very long with the rapid onset of boredom I had to create my own amusement. Torrevieja hospital is a nightmare for all who suffer from technophobia and their latest Orwellian machines in the reception area offer no respite.

Having suffered minor technical difficulties ourselves, and only getting it to function after accepting the help of a young woman who was also waiting to see the doctor, did we manage to obtain our ticket.

Therefore, having nothing better to do, I decided to take on the machines and appoint myself unofficial technical support person. These three electronic chrome marvels stand proudly in a row with their touch screens inviting everyone to either confirm their arrival or request an appointment. You have three options: place your SIP card into a slot, scan the barcode on your appointment letter across the reader, or manually enter your SIP number onto the touch screen keypad.

Standing to one side observing other peoples attempts at achieving hitting the jackpot, a little printed ticket giving you the Holy Grail of a confirmed place in the queue, proved highly educational. Because, judging by the high percentage of persons failing to get the machine to co-operate, the designers have totally failed to allow for the creativeness of the human mind. I was initially surprised at the general understanding of the possibility for it to read a bar code. However, they failed totally to use the actual reader and instead gamely waved their letters at the normal screen result: failure. The card reader slot fared no better. The screen clearly shows a diagram of which way to insert your card but I observed most Spanish much prefer to decide for themselves which way to insert their card than to follow instructions! Same result.

Feeling that I now had progressed sufficiently along the learning curve I opted to bravely step in and with my limited Spanish vocabulary offer some technical support to these beleaguered technophobes. My actions resulted in significantly better success rates with the high tech beasts and faster ticket production. I was multitasking keying in SIP card numbers, explaining the bar code option and using Spanish I did not know I had. My efforts were well received with expressions of sincere gratitude from my satisfied Spanish customers.

Feeling proud to have mastered the machines, and even prouder that my Spanish was adequate to explain the electronic terrorist’s functions, I then realised what, or rather who, was now entertaining the crowd seated in the waiting area adjacent to the machines. Having become equally bored awaiting their turn, my ongoing antics had become their amusement. The young woman who had initially helped us suggested that I apply for a job and I quite liked her idea. Then I became embroiled in an interesting discussion with a German woman on the topic of European hospitals and how high tech things were in Torrevieja. Naturally, I helped her to obtain her ticket also. After all this is a multi cultural society and we must do our bit for social cohesion.

Nearly two hours since our arrival had flown past; I always like to arrive optimistically early. Finally, my wife emerged from her consultation, and I regaled her with my exploits quite forgetting to enquire as to the state of her health. Fortunately, during my pausing for breath, she managed to tell me that she was all clear. A good afternoon all round then. Almost a shame as that meant I would not get to staff the technical support again soon, no only joking. Next appointment the tax office, now I wonder what sort of machines they have?

Rob Innis

www.spainrico.com